I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
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A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
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you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
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