You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
