yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize