Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
