Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
