New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Operation Purity has been aborted
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Panties = found
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
