Whatcha textin bout Willis?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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