it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
