How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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