with your own penis?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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