thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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