Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
