All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
She even gives head with a lisp.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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