ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I had to cum in my sink.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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