Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
