Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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