hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
