Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize