Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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