See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize
