she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
