all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
handjob tips. give me some.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
