Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
