i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
