gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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