peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize