I wish I only lived at night.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
