I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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