What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
