I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
