Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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