Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize