I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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