I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize