White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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