She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
