they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
