I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
