I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
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I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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