and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
