Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
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