she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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