I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
