Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
