Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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