I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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