i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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