no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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