awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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