Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
