u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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