Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
This couple is walking their pig around campus
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
